February 17, 2020

You Expected Your Aquarius Love Interest To Be Caring & Faithful? ~ The Crowd Roars With Laughter

When The Moon Is In The 7th House & Jupiter Aligns With Mars

I was born early in the first week of February, so astrologically, that makes me an Aquarius Sun. And I married another Aquarius Sun.

Yes indeed, Casper His Ghostness was also an Aqua. Danger Will Robinson! Danger Will Robinson!

The reason this raises eyebrows and gives one one pause is because anyone who knows the least bit about astrology knows the old joke about Aquarians being ‘out there’.

They say that Aquarius women have an affinity for attracting and being able to calm people who have ‘issues’ [okay, insane people] into their lives.

Aquarius males are well known for getting bored, having mental freak outs, and simply up and disappearing. So what do you suppose that says about Casper and me, and about our fated one time attraction to each other?

Two Aquarians in one household? It’s like Karma Chameleon, The Miniseries. Yikes! No wonder our  breakup became an ‘Ordeal’.

High Voltage On a Good Day

See those two wavy lines in the glyph above? They represent energy. The stuff that life’s made of—the juju—the juice. But look again. See how those two lines of electricity are running parallel and in synchrony? Well, that makes for an easy-breezy environment in the good times when each person intuitively picks up the other one’s vibes. When this happens, few words need to be spoken.

In other words, when all that positive energy is happy to be traveling along in tandem, both of partners are ‘on the same wavelength’. That is—until they aren’t. Imagine what you get when one of those high voltage lines decides to go rogue.

They CAN and DO get out of sync with the other. When this happens the two lovers who once mind-melded then become Richochet Rabbits … Farts in a skillet … Water dropped into oil … Raw mental energy bounces all over the place.

Here’s The Deal

Both of these Aquarians are deep thinkers and mentalists, and that can be a good thing. However, having said that, it’s important to note that neither of them arrive out-of-the-box with any compunction to open up about themselves. Neither of them have the desire to expose their inner sanctum to an ‘other’ for the sake of intimacy. They’re perfectly happy to exist in their own mental comfort zones, just walking around every day doing all that deep thinking—relying on everyone outside them to intuit what’s on their twisted eccentric minds.

Intimacy, while very deeply desired by Aquarians, is also viewed as a huge risk—tantamount to the possible death of their individuality. So what do they do? They whip out and play the aloof card with anyone who gets too close to them—yet they jump with total abandon when it comes to loving mankind as a whole.

In other words, they’re the first ones to take to the streets and storm the castle for the disenfranchised or mistreated. But, where their close associates and family members are concerned, it’s like the song by Sting—they’re always thinking: “Don’t stand so close to me.’ To them, it’s all about ‘the collective’. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, they’re icing the individuals that love and care fore them the most. See what I mean? They’re more than a little weird.

 I Think You’re Not Talking To Me Is Getting Too Loud

So when two Aquarian live wires are no longer running along in sync with each other [and by the way, neither of them will tell the other that this has occurred], things can become a scrambled mess. What you end up with is two very smart people having having all these cerebral conversations, but only in their own heads. This is a very crucial concept that you MUST understand, or you will be scratching your head, forever wondering what’s up with these oddballs.

There’s no other way to say it. Two Aquarians together is a dance macabre. They have a definite mental connection, and they may even feel [for a while] that the other is a soul mate. But the danger to avoid here is that without LOTS of work at open communication, each person will ‘think‘ the other person ‘should‘ already ‘know‘ what they’ve been ruminating on inside their mind, despite the fact that they have never verbalized any of it to the other person.

To put it bluntly, it feels a lot like playing whack-a-mole with invisible varmints. Or like living in a perpetual game of charades, with no gesturing allowed. Clairvoyance and rules of the game sold separately. Batteries not included. However you slice and dice it, it definitely keeps you on your toes.

A Word To The Wise Is Sufficient

Here’s the takeaway, ladies and gentlemen. If you’re thinking that you might [even remotely!] be inclined towards signing up for a committed relationship with an Aquarius—and you’re expecting that relationship to include a healthy component of intimacy—put the crack pipe down and back away from the table.

Break the glass. Pull the fire alarm. Exit the game ‘with the quickness’. Do whatever you have to do—but flee.

Go directly to jail. Put yourself in protective custody for your own well being until the crazy urge to couple with such a weirdo subsides. Forfeit your monopolies.  Remove your hotels from Boardwalk and Park Place. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. It’ll be a Mad Hatters’ Tea Party if you don’t.

Odds Are …

The standing joke is that with Aquarians, there’s a fine line between their brilliant genius and eccentricity [okay:insanity]. So unless you’ve been an acrobat with the circus since you were 12, or you’ve already perfected the fine art of tightrope walking in your daredevil act, my suggestion is that you run for your life.

Ladies, your odds of surviving an Aquarius man are like trying to find an honest black jack dealer in Vegas. All bets are off. Don’t ask for any more cards because you’re up against someone who has long been dealing from the bottom of the deck. Turn your cards over and fold. Cash in your remaining chips and leave the casino. Now.

If you don’t, you’ll spend the rest of your relationship wobbling atop his/her high voltage lines, only to one day be suddenly jolted with rogue current and find yourself electrocuted. In other words, you’ll be walking along one day, thinking all is well and then—ZAP!—you find yourself charred, flipped upside down, on the ground, and still smoking as your kooky Aquarius short circuits and suddenly goes missing.

Having been married to one for 29 years and ghosted unexpectedly on Valentine’s Day—to never hear from him again. I know of what I speak. In addition to that, my biological father was also an Aquarius.

He was a serial abandoner, marrying, then ghosting seven [yes 7!] wives … fathering twelve [yes 12!] legitimate children before he died of sudden cardiac arrest at 65. Lord knows how more many illegitimate children he had scattered here and there.

I know I’ve painted a bleak picture and no doubt, not everyone is like Casper or my dad. Your mileage may vary. But, I’m just sayin’ …

Lighten Up & Relax!

The focus of this blog is to serve up some much needed humor. I wanted to use this particular post to lighten the mood by poking fun at both Casper and myself with this bit of Aquarius humor.

My strange bedfellow was not the typical humanitarian concerned Aquarius. Nope, I drew the short straw and took home an Aquarius male who turned out to be more like a bucket full of crazy than the stereotypical hippie peace and love.

Now, to be fair, he did occasionally emit sparks of humanity. But I now know from my study on narcissism that those sparks were just false advertising to keep me hooked and looking for the best in him. Because when I wasn’t looking, he discharged his current all at once and disappeared.

Oh, well. It’s not all bad though. I truly believe that there’s always a silver lining in every tragedy if you put in the time and effort to look for one. And when you find it, you have throw open the curtains and sing the second half of the 1960’s Age Of Aquarius Anthem …


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